Through the Looking Glass: Army Republic

KLONDIKE, CPAC Newsroom — The Army Republic has held a position as a top army for many months now, due to catalysts like Buritodaily, Vinny, and their creator 122344a. However, as Vinny and Burito’s respective retirements approach, can the army stay afloat? In the debut of Through the Looking Glass, I’ll take a look at just how stable the Army Republic is, and exactly where I believe they will be one year from now, in August of 2014.  Welcome to the first edition of Through the Looking Glass. This is the debut of a new column in CPAC in which I will be taking a look at the majority of the Top Ten Armies, in any random order. In this post I’ll talk about the army itself, and where I see it heading in the coming months — basically, it’s a prediction of where your army will be by the year 2014. This post is in no way meant to offend anyone in the Army Republic, it is simply my prediction of the road the army is headed on. This post is not only my opinion, but other influential people in the army world have also been canvassed for their thoughts. 

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This Week: Army Republic

I’ll be honest, when I first drafted this post, the AR held a rank of 3rd in the Top Ten, so I didn’t expect to be starting with the army currently placed first. Nevertheless, I don’t think AR’s current placement in the Top Ten at all changes the ambiguity of where the army will be by the year 2014.

The army itself has been the subject of news now more than ever in the recent weeks, following wars that the media has hounded such as the AR/ACP war and their ongoing war with the Rebel Penguin Federation. I’m going to identify what I think some of the major themes are regarding AR’s future in this world, and speak to some influential people both inside and outside the army as to their thoughts on its future. This is the debut of the column, so please make sure to comment with whether or not you want this segment to be continued.

1. The army has two major catalysts.

One of the things that’s impossible to deny when taking a look at the Army Republic right now is that Buritodaily and Vinny, who have led the army off and on for years now, are its two major catalysts. 122344a is also extremely important to the structure of the army, though AR has proven they can survive without him while Burito and Vinny are around. If you look at how the Army Republic has done in the recent years, there’s a very clear-cut pattern that speaks volumes about the army.

When Burito and Vinny are around, the army does well. Usually, they hover around the area in the Top Three or Top Five. Without them, the army falters, sometimes doing well and sometimes failing to remain at their top spot in the army world. Just like Elmikey to the RPF, Burito and Vinny are the necessary parts of the army — but unlike the situation in RPF, where it has been proven that other leaders have led the army to glory (albeit many years ago) — the same cannot be said for the Army Republic. In the research I’ve done, the conclusion I have come to is that in no major generation or era that lasted more than two months, did the AR rise to the top without the assistance of at least one of the two.

I’m not sure how well those who are to be appointed leaders will do — rumors range from names like Slick and Theory, to Emmarose, who has been seemingly guaranteed one of the two leader spots following Vindaily’s retirement. Lord Jay was expected to fill the second leadership position, but sources report after major fallouts with both AR’s current leaders and some of the leaders-to-be, Jay’s spot may no longer be guaranteed. Which brings me to my next topic of interest.

2. The chatroom is an episode of Jersey Shore.

No offense to anyone in this army, but at any point in time the owners could be engaged in a large argument if Vinny and Burito aren’t there to moderate what’s going on. Arguments among the ownership in general are very high, and, as in any other chat, it branches into the moderators and members, who inevitably join into the discussion.

The major topic is about one thing: what some are calling the “girl’s generation.” People like Emmarose, Sanmiasha and Theory are in prime spots to become the new influential owners in the Army Republic — along with some guys, don’t get me wrong. The problem is, some of the other owners who, you guessed it, are guys, have begun labeling this as the “AR Girls Generation” and criticizing many of those who are set to succeed Vindaily — possibly out of their own desire for the leadership ranks.

I’ve said this before; there’s a lot of talent in the AR Ownership, but the ownership itself is becoming divided into two major sides. Burito and Vinny are the only people who are keeping the owners in line, and they are preaching exactly the truth: that if these owners do not get their act together, the army will fall. Whats Up11 was just fired last night due to his continue arguing with many owners in the army, and the rankings in general just seem extremely unstable to me without the support of Burr and Vinny.

3. If the AR does fall, they’ve made alot of enemies recently.

The Army Republic in general has been the spotlight of news in recent weeks, with their wars with longtime ally the ACP, and the war with the Rebel Penguin Federation, which is just now coming to an end. The army has been extremely successful in both wars, holding out at first place in the Top Ten for two weeks now — and many would argue that the AR is responsible for the fall of RPF, which currently resides at 6th in the Top Ten. While this is all well and good, this is much like the situation ACP faced during Summer 2012.

Let me put it this way: during the years in which ACP was the number one army, they were attacked countless times, which I’m sure all of you know. Over and over again, lone armies and alliances such as the BA attempted to knock the ACP off their pillar, usually with mediocre success until the Summer of 2012. However, I don’t for one minute believe that the fall was completely because of the Black Alliance. It was also a large internal failure.

What do I mean by that? Incapable owners, inactive leaders, everything that would make any army fall. The fall of ACP wasn’t just due to their constant hounding by the Black Alliance, though that was the major player in their fall. If the ACP could have kept it together internally, they may have been able to cushion the blow of their fall. The point is, if the ownership doesn’t begin to make friends, they could face a major internal failure as well.

Look, Burito and Vinny have made it very clear that they don’t plan to come back and save the army every time it falls back down again, so this is a job the ownership is going to need to do on their own. And now, the stakes are even higher for whoever will take over the AR leadership. Whoever comes into power now will have to attempt to retain AR’s place at first, with kingpins like the Nachos fighting to regain their spot. The last thing a new leader wants when assuming power is having to fight multiple wars while trying to get the ropes. If they can’t do it fast enough and keep AR powerful, we may have many wars not too far away.

The Panel

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What do you predict will happen to the Army Republic in the following weeks, and where do you predict the army will be by late 2014?

Lord West [DCP]: It’s hard to give my opinion on that issue. Anything could happen within a given time. At first, the Nachos and RPF were at World Power. Now they’re down to 4th and 6th place. Only time can tell what will happen to AR.

Vinny [AR]: At first, no doubt, AR will fall, not fail, but fall. They will sooner or later get used to the troops. The troops won’t listen to them right off the bat, and they need to know that. By late 2014, if they get their acts together, and come together as one, they will become a top 5-6 army.

Beeky [Nachos]: It’s up to them.

Aaron [UMA]: Probably dead. Burr, Vinny and 122344a are the heart of AR. Without them, it’s dead.

Casius Brutus [ACP]: I think that they might have a slight drop in the first couple of weeks, but if the new leaders are competent, they could very well continue success.

Sir PJ [RPF]: I think AR are going to take a massive fall due to Burr and Vinny retiring. They will probably be able to recover, but I don’t think they’ll see number one in the Top Ten for awhile.

My Prediction: The AR, no doubt, will take a fall. Its catalysts are leaving. However, all hope is not lost for the army. If the owners can heed Burr and Vinny’s words and realize that for AR to continue to be influential, they have to work as a cohesive machine, than the ownership could do just fine.

What do YOU think? 

๖̶̶̶ۣۜмaтт.вℓυєѕσᴄкωa1

CPA Central CEO

22 Responses

  1. Well saying Ar chat is like jersey shore is pretty a big oversaterartion

  2. bias acp shud b furst

  3. But Looking-glass armies are never good, kitty!

  4. I think a cataclysm that hits every inch of the CP army community is indeed imminent. Over the coarse of the next few weeks we’re going to see somethings we have failed to even conceive of yet. ACP tenth. Nuff said.

    AR has never had the reputation of the most stable army around. A leadership change has always been known to shake up an army. Even more so, cause of the fact that they have never had one prior to this.

    I think this very well maybe the demise of AR. But things can change in the blink of an eye.

  5. I see. Yes of course, I was fired. But of course, my bitching always gets me somewhere bad, and that should be a lesson to you all. I was fired all because of my bitching and continuous arguing.

  6. AR has been one of the most stable armies in CP armies lately, lol. What are you talking about?

    • In my personal opinion, it’s been stable because of you and Burr. Was my point.

  7. lul that girls generation thing was a joke xD

  8. All armies take a fall when acquiring new leadership. Once the new leaders get settled in and the troops get used to them, we will be great again.

  9. They will fall ikit inless sheep becomes leader and turns ar in sheep republic

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